


The Ghost of Outbound Flight

by thriftstoreteacup



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Outbound Flight - Timothy Zahn
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:48:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23380450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thriftstoreteacup/pseuds/thriftstoreteacup
Summary: After Outbound Flight crash lands deep in Chiss territory, Lorana Jinzler finds that even though her physical body has died in the crash, her spirit lingers among the survivors, tasked with watching over them until help arrives.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 2





	1. Cacophony

Lorana braced for an impact that never came. Confused, she looked around, or tried to anyway. All that Lorana could see and hear and feel was a jumble of shapes and sounds and sensations with no discernable source or meaning. “I must have a concussion.” Loana guessed. She tried to use the Force to examine herself, to get a sense of the location and severity of her injuries, but all that Lorana could sense was more jibberish. Panic threatened to overtake her as Lorana struggled to make sense of what was happening. Her Jedi training won out against her fear however, and Lorana began to slow down, to calm herself. She focused her attention away from fighting to make sense of her distorted surroundings, reminding herself instead to be still, to accept the current situation for what it was, and to let the Force guide her. 

Slowly, little by little, the confusion began to sort itself out, and little snippets of clarity came to Lorana. She heard part of a conversation here, saw a group of the survivors assessing the damage to their vessel there, and she was even beginning to be able to differentiate between the different survivors’ swirling cacophony of emotions that they were unknowingly broadcasting into the Force. Lorana had never felt a group of people through the Force this strongly before. She realized that this was the reason why everything had seemed so distorted. It was as though she suddenly was hearing, seeing, and feeling everyone on Outbound Flight all at once. “Something about the crash must have heightened my sense of all of these people.” Lorana thought. “But why?” As Lorana puzzled over this question, another one occurred to her. It seemed that her increased sensitivity to everyone else on Outbound Flight had come at the cost of her ability to discern her own self. It was as though Lorana were lost in the crowd, or… the realization struck her like a slap in the face, she was not there at all. 

With the shock of this revelation, all of Lorana’s senses descended back into muddled, indecipherable chaos. She, or, her body at least, had not survived the crash after all. Now, her spirit, one with the living Force, floated among the remaining survivors whom Lorana had given her life to save. “But why?” Lorana asked herself again. “Why am I still here? Is this some kind of penance? Is it because I didn’t do enough to stop Master C’baoth from getting everyone into this mess?” Lorana briefly gave herself up to despair. She hadn’t even wanted to come along on Outbound Flight. Why should she be the one to be stuck here ever-after? 

After some thought, and some time for the initial shock of being dead to wear off a little, Lorana decided that this was not some sort of divine retribution. “After all, I wasn’t the only Jedi aboard Outbound Flight, and none of the rest of them appear to be here.” She decided that instead of being some sort of punishment for the Jedi aboard Outbound Flight, particularly Master C’baoth, overstepping their duty as guardians and peacekeepers, this must be a continuation of that same duty, which she had already sacrificed her physical life to carry out. 

As Lorana calmed herself down again, she began to see things more clearly through the guidance of the Force. What was left of Outbound Flight would be stranded here for many years to come before there would be any hope of rescue. In the meantime, as the last Jedi Knight aboard, who had given her life in order that the rest would have a fighting chance at survival, the duty to watch over these people until help arrived had fallen on Lorana’s shoulders. With renewed understanding and purpose, Lorana set herself patiently to the task of unraveling the cacophony of voices and feelings and visions that made up her perception of the survivors of Outbound Flight, searching first for a way to understand, so that then, she hoped, she would be able to help them endure their long and lonely exile to come. 


	2. Contemplation

Lorana’s first challenge was to get her bearings. Being able to see and hear the perspectives of people all over the ship at once was disorienting. She concentrated on quieting her mind. “Do I really even have a mind to quiet anymore?” Lorana wondered. She wished she could talk to someone about this. “Master Yoda has been a Jedi for hundreds of years, maybe he could tell me what’s happening. Then again, maybe not. He is after all, still alive. Could anyone still living really understand?” For a moment, loneliness and fear threatened to overtake Lorana. She had done more than she thought herself capable of doing, holding Outbound Flight together for as long as she did already, but the thought of having to navigate this strange new way of life, “way of _ being _ ” Lorana corrected herself, all on her own was overwhelming. With renewed effort, Lorana made herself put these thoughts out of her mind, or whatever it was, “consciousness?” She could navel gaze about the philosophical implications and worry herself sick about what ifs forever, probably, but that wouldn’t help anyone. Lorana clung desperately to the one thing she felt fairly certain of right now, that the purpose of all of this was so that she could help. She vowed that she would, as soon as she could figure out how. 

Unsure of what else to do, Lorana imagined herself taking a deep breath, and then another. She concentrated as hard as she could on that thought, until little by little, the chorus of sights and sounds and feelings faded away. Afraid that all of the disorienting noise would come rushing back like a tsunami if her concentration wavered, Lorana didn’t dare turn her attention away from her imaginary breath for a long while. Finally, she worked up the nerve to timidly try thinking about something new. 

“I should probably start with a look around.” Lorana mused. “That will give me a better idea of how bad the damage is.” She decided to start with D-6, and work her way around the circle, coming to D-1 last. Lorana knew that she couldn’t put off visiting the place where she had died, alongside her unlikely ally and friend Mitth’ras’afis forever. For now though, that memory, the two of them taking one another’s hands to offer what little comfort to each other that they could as they made their peace with death, was still too fresh, too raw. “May the Force be with you, wherever you are Mitth’ras’afis.” Lorana imagined herself saying. She still didn’t know how to speak without a body, but somehow, perhaps through a subtle reassurance from the Force itself, she knew that she had spoken those words aloud. With that, Lorana put the painful memory of her last living moments out of her mind, and focused her full attention and awareness on D-6, and the task in front of her. 


	3. Communication

Weeks passed, perhaps even months, years? Lorana found keeping track of the passage of time difficult without a corporeal body. However long it had been since Outbound Flight had crash-landed, it felt entirely too long for Lorana to have made so little progress in figuring out what she was supposed to be doing here.  Touring the ship, assessing the damage, and even confronting her own physical mortality at her own and Mitth’ras’safis’ final resting place had proven to be the easy part. After she had done that, Lorana had set herself to the task of making contact with the survivors. She had hoped, at first, that she would be able to communicate with them easily, and find a way to make herself useful to them. Lorana had some ideas about how to do that already. As someone who was already dead, she could volunteer to scout out more dangerous parts of the wreckage, or, as someone uniquely connected to the living Force, she could offer to call upon the Force for guidance on the survivor’s behalf. None of that could do anyone a bit of good however, if Lorana couldn’t make herself heard. 

Lorana had tried every means of communicating that she could think of. At first, she tried just talking to them, but they couldn’t hear her. She tried knocking on the walls and moving objects around, but this proved to be surprisingly exhausting, and without fail, everyone she tried to contact this way managed to come up with some other explanation for what she had done. In a moment of desperation, Lorana even tried that persuasion technique that she had seen Master Kenobi do. In all honesty, she didn’t really try that one very hard. It felt too much like the kind of manipulation that Master C’baoth favored that Lorana had never really been comfortable with, and when Master C’baoth embraced the dark side, Lorana took it as confirmation that her unease about that sort of meddling with people’s minds had been justified. It was no surprise then, that this didn’t work either. 

The longer Lorana lingered as an observer unable to interact with the people she had sworn to protect, the more discouraged she became. Not only was she unable to be useful in any way, which was frustrating enough on its own, but the more time passed, the more Lorana saw the ugly consequences of her and the other Jedis’ failure to rein in Master C’baoth before it was too late. As the survivors got themselves organized so as to establish a form of self-governance until help should arrive, or in perpetuity if help should never come, it became clear that they, especially the ones in charge, resented and deeply distrusted the Jedi and the Force. It pained Lorana to see how much they hated and feared the Jedi, even as she tried so hard to find a way to help them. The fact that she couldn’t really blame them, considering how things had gone during Outbound Flight’s all too brief voyage, only made it worse. “If only I could find a way to talk to them.” Lorana lamented to herself. “I could explain things. I could help. I could prove that not all of the Jedi are like Master C’baoth.” Lorana began to wonder again, in her despair, if her sole reason for being here was to bear witness to what can happen when Jedi overstep their duty as guides and guardians, and become tyrants. “But that doesn’t make any sense either.” thought Lorana. “What is the purpose of me seeing this? What can I do about it if I can’t interact with anyone? Why am I even here?!” For a long time, Lorana pondered this miserably, and gave herself up to despair.

Finally, when Lorana had given up all hope of contacting the living ever again, she finally, accidently had the breakthrough that she had been searching for. Lorana had taken to wandering around the ship, watching the people go about their lives without her, trying to make herself be content with being only an outside observer. She was wandering through the makeshift school for the children, when Lorana noticed that one of them seemed to be watching her. She stopped, shocked, and hardly daring to believe it. Lorana waved at the child, and he waved back! Lorana smiled. Relief flooded through her. She walked up to the boy, who looked to be about ten years old, she guessed. Lorana spoke, desperately hoping to be heard at last, “Hello! My name is Lorana. What’s your name?” “Deric.” said the child. After her long exile as an imperceivable spirit, It was the most beautiful sound Lorana had ever heard. Then, the boy continued. “I remember you, from the Jedi school. You were going to teach me how to be a Jedi.” Realization hit Lorana full-force. It seemed so obvious in hindsight. As a being who existed only in the Force, she would only be able to communicate with people who were sensitive to the Force. She had been trying and trying to talk to the adult survivors, but all this time it had never once occurred to Lorana to try talking to any of the children. “Of course! This is my chance!” Lorana thought. “This is how I can help!” 

With renewed determination and excitement, she said to Deric “I still can if you want. Would you like to learn how to be a Jedi?” Deric squirmed in his seat for a moment, thinking. “My parents say that Jedi are bad. They say that Jedi steal children away from their families forever and ever.” Lorana thought carefully about what to say next. How much of what happened should she try to explain to this child? “Jedi are people, just like you and your parents and everyone else.” Lorana began. “The only difference between a Jedi and anybody else is that a Jedi can feel the Force, and has promised to use that ability to help people.” Lorana paused, hoping that Deric would believe her, or, at the very least, would be willing to keep listening. When he nodded, she continued “The Jedi who was in charge of Outbound Flight when we first started our journey forgot the most important thing about being a Jedi.” Even after all this time and everything that had happened, it still felt subversive and strange to Lorana to be speaking about her former teacher this way, but it was the truth, and it was important, so she went on, “He forgot his promise to help people.” Lorana paused again, this next part was the hardest to admit to anyone, but she knew that she must. “And it took the rest of us too long to realize it. By the time we tried to stop him, it was too late.” Lorana waited for Deric’s reaction. Out of habit, she held her breath, or imagined that she did. He looked thoughtful, and after what felt to Lorana like an eternity, he said “I don’t know how I know, but I know that you are not a bad Jedi.” Lorana was overjoyed! She smiled warmly and told Deric “That is the Force. If you listen to it carefully, the Force is always there to guide you.” Then, she asked again, “Would you like to learn more about the Force?” To Lorana’s elation, Deric nodded yes. 

Just then, it was time for the children to go back home to their quarters. Lorana and Deric exchanged goodbyes, and Lorana started making plans for how she would begin teaching the children who were Force-sensitive enough to be able to hear her. Lorana was so excited, so preoccupied with her plans, that she did not notice the horrified expression on the face of the teacher, who had overheard one of the children, one who was already under suspicion, having a conversation about Jedi with someone who wasn’t there.


	4. Consolation and Companionship

Lorana’s excitement at finally finding a way to communicate soon became bitter disappointment. She had underestimated just how deeply Master C’baoth’s abuse of power had poisoned the relationship between the survivors and the Jedi. She tried desperately to explain to them, through Deric and a few others, that she meant no harm, that she sought no power, that she wanted only to help, but she found herself facing an impenetrable wall of mistrust, suspicion, and fear. With that fear clouding their judgement, the gift of the Force became a curse, and a prison of sorts was hastily constructed to keep any potential Jedi separate from the rest of the survivors for the remainder of their time aboard Outbound Flight, however long that may be. 

“I’m sorry.” The jailor said, as he locked the door. “We just can’t take any chances.” The exiles, all of the ones who had once been singled out by C’baoth to be trained as Jedi, plus one or two others, huddled together in what was to be their new “home” for the foreseeable future. Lorana appeared to them then. She herself was overcome with grief and remorse over these unintended consequences of her interference, but she put her own feelings aside as far as she was able. Lorana vowed that if she could do nothing else for the survivors of Outbound Flight, she at least would offer what comfort and companionship she could to these exiles. Some of them welcomed her right from the start, a few never did warm up to her at all, and the rest fell somewhere in between. Lorana allowed each of them to choose for themselves when and how much they wanted her around. To those who wanted to know, she kept them informed of what was going on elsewhere on the ship. She taught all who would listen everything that she knew about the Force and the Jedi. With regard to those on the outside, Lorana humbled herself. She could not make them trust her, or want her help. She stood aside and stopped trying to communicate with them, except to try to pass along the occasional message from one of the exiles to a loved one. 

Years passed. Little by little, Lorana found herself seeming to fade away. She found it increasingly difficult to anchor herself to the time and place where Outbound Flight was. Lorana found herself pleading with the living Force “I can’t just leave them all alone!” Even as she said this though, Lorana felt that she might as well be a stone by a seashore, pleading with the waves to stop washing it out into the sea, little by little. Unlike the waves however, the Force answered Lorana. “They won’t be.” It was then that Lorana saw a vision, crystal clear of a strangely familiar looking man gazing out of the viewport of a ship. He had a drink in his hand, and when she saw him raise it, Lorana heard the words of his heart “To Lorana.” It was Dean! The brother who Lorana had met by chance so long ago, who had been so bothered by so much bitterness and resentment toward her. He looked so much older now, and there was a deep sadness about him that had not been there before, but Lorana knew, through the reassurance of the Force, that he was on his way here this very moment, and that here he would find the peace that she had told him at their last meeting so long ago that she had hoped he would. Though she could see only her brother in this vision, Lorana could feel that there were others with him, including two Jedi. It was then that Lorana knew that things would be alright for the survivors of Outbound Flight who she had watched over for so very long.

With a tremendous effort, Lorana appeared to her companions in exile one last time. She told them of her vision, of the two Jedi, and the others with them. Then, Lorana bid each of them farewell in turn, and, satisfied that her last duty was fulfilled, finally let go, and allowed all that was left of her individual consciousness to dissolve into the warmth of the living Force.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To those of you who have read this far, thank you so much! I hope that you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. 
> 
> May the Force be with you.


End file.
